Chris Wilkinson column: Cowichan man putting money where his mouth is in mission to reduce stigma

By Chris Wilkinson

I sat down with my friend, mental health and addictions worker Wayne Bourgeois, last week and wanted to know more about why he does what he does. And what he does is deeply meaningful. Wayne is cycling across Canada this summer to raise awareness and reduce the stigma attached to substance-affected and homeless individuals. This a nearly three month long cycling journey that he and his friend and colleague Ron are completing. And yes, Terry Fox is one of Wayne's heroes if you were curious.

Completing such a feat will be grueling. And it's not through work so Wayne isn't being paid to do this. And much of the expenses so far have been out of pocket. Wayne has already organized, with the help and support of the Cowichan Brain Injury Society, a hockey tournament in April, a golf tourney last week, and a 12-Hour Relay at the Cowichan Sportsplex coming up June 10. And so I wondered, why, Wayne?

When one gets to meet Wayne, he's about the easiest guy to get along with. He's quiet and unassuming, friendly and kind, and has a hell of a personal story that inspires his mission.

You see, Wayne was homeless once too. He grew up in an abusive home with a father who was physically, verbally, and emotionally abusive. And a mother who was battered, which comes with collateral damage. It ruined Wayne for a number of years. A talented hockey goalie, Wayne had opportunities to play junior hockey on the prairies. The abuse he endured robbed him of the mental strength and skills, the passion and motivation, he needed to pursue that dream.

As a teenager Wayne became homeless, resorting to a life of drugs and crime. Couch surfing at friends' houses until that dried up. Sleeping in unlocked vehicles. Struggling to eat. Struggling to find drugs to numb the unbearable emotional pain.

The low point came around Christmas 1986. Wayne was at a house party and was using — he was using with high risk. Risky amounts too. If one guy was using something, Wayne would do double or triple. A death wish. But then a miracle happened. The moment Wayne said changed his life. The moment he recalls to this day as clearly as when it happened. A clear, calm, deep, authoritative voice spoke to him: "If you do that again you're going to die".

Wayne has never used again. And eventually Wayne went back to school to get his diploma in Child & Youth Care. Today's Wayne is nothing like the young Wayne.

Wayne has also been keeping good on another promise he made to himself. When he lived in a group home after his parents split, he often said to himself that he could provide much better care than what he was receiving. In those moments the seeds were planted for Wayne to become the carer and caregiver that he is now. Wayne has delivered care in numerous ways. He has worked in facilities; he has opened his home to those in need of stable care and housing; he has case managed homeless and substance-affected individuals. And now he is fundraising and contributing his own time, energy and money to help bring awareness and reduce the stigma attached to substance-affected individuals. Wayne wants affected individuals to know that there are people out there listening.

One need only watch a few of Dr. Gabor Maté's YouTube videos to start to understand trauma and how debilitating it can be. And how wide reaching and deeply affecting it is. Everyone, and I mean everyone, has experienced some kind of trauma. It becomes the slippery slope that soon becomes nearly unrecoverable.

Wayne reminded me that some of the individuals he helps are daughters, sons, parents, brothers, sisters, homeowners, business owners, productive members of society. He wisely stated that, "We all have addictions…it's just that some are maladaptive." And Wayne's comment that hit me like a freight train: "Any one of us are one traumatic event away from crisis."

So, the next time someone goes to say, 'get a fricken job', or calls a homeless person a 'loser', or says to 'let 'em die' or 'throw 'em all in jail' (Wayne's heard them all), I would hope we could check our ego at the door and realize this is one of the most complicated problems there is to try and solve. Perhaps unsolvable in a single generation.

People like Wayne, who care, are doing their best to try and save lives. And perhaps to save our community.

To help, please donate to Wayne and his 'Road to Recovery' mission, supported by the Cowichan Brain Injury Society. Please visit https://gofund.me/963011d6 to help Wayne meet his goal of raising $25,000 for local programs.

Chris Wilkinson is a High Performance Coach and works with driven small business owners and entrepreneurs who want to achieve bigger goals. For more information visit www.CoachingWithChris.ca or email Chris at info@CoachingWithChris.ca